Hare: Mary Morss
Co-Hare:Nick Morss, Colin Hercus
Venue:Rasa
Scribe:Tommy Chin ( Substituting for Alvin Chah)
This location was banned from hashing, some years ago, due to presence of notorious bees. A number of hashers were stung and hospitalized, then. But, alas, over recent years, the outcrop of overwhelming demand for local wild honey appears to have annihilated the hives and bees from these parts, what the honey people call, overharvesting…human stings on beehives, more potent than bee stings on human. You see, being substitute scribe, I can write anything under the sky and when things go wrong, the scribe is to blame, yahoo! Alvin, the scribe, has flown off somewhere, got me to scribe and now I wonder why I agreed especially having forgotten I’m flying off tomolo as well. I hope this sorry ass gets anwarised when he’s back perhaps on the 16th , but I guess nothing will happen when everyone get badawised ‘stand-sleeping’ cos I am trying to avoid being so f-ing nice that it becomes cruel to be nice!
Alright, lets get right down to bizness, huh (Jimmy, right?..is that how you say it..).
We reached the run site in barely an hour from wherever we normally came from, no one was late…not even our incredible GM Dave who normally drive down from work in JB, fly from Denmark, swim across from work islands in the South, sometimes Singapore(?), coupled with coping with fierce renovations at home, defending Charlotte from wrestling it out with the electricians, carpenters, tile layers, masons and all sorts of labourers, including accidental pipe breakers. Frankly, I do hope all you guys here can see, the man is not superman but close to it though, considering most of the aforesaid . Thank you GM Dave. On this day, a clean shaven GM Dave set the Run off at precisely 4.30pm, handled a vicious dog fight between Zorro and Michael’s leashed Dobby, completed the Run, ran the Circle later and off he went for another emergency calling, presumably, from ‘Jimmy Olsen’. (Note: On 2nd thoughts, seriously so, I think Mike’s dobby ought to be muzzled as hash dogs seem to go for the dobby and lands up being bitten badly. I hope Zorro’s alright).
The sun was blazing, flushed red faced hashers straggled off at the start of the Run. We promptly veered left in to shady hillside tracks and hit Check #1 which continued down slope. Check# 2 took long to break. I checked high up a ragged bushy hill, awkwardly a checking in despair as it showed up, recceing through multilevel terraces up, up, over the top and no paper still. No call nor sight of any hashers could be heard or seen by then. Only palm rattan and very thick bushes everywhere. I looked back far below, realised I am not very clever as usual and started making my way down. I did not think any hashers would be as stupid as I until Carlo and then Kwai Hoong showed up, ha ha. I am so glad. We cut 45 Degrees down all the way across the terraces in the direction of faint ON ON calls far away across the side of the swamp. Carlo hit right and he was right. By then, I had gone the less right way down lower and nearer the ON ON calls only to realize that what separated me from the paper trail high above was a blasted knee deep swamp with overgrown lallang, floating dead branches, decayed trunks, black muddy stinking waters,..eew… and Kwai Hoong was behind urging me on, curtly, asking me - why so slow? Hello-o, fyi, I was still on Steroid Eyedrops and Arcoxia Painkillers but you know, Unc Shag will tell you that the painkiller is “I cocks yuh”. Just when I felt eerie thinking this little stretch of swamp was habitat to plenty of camouflaged dirty hungry crocodiles lurking around underneath, a sudden sharp voice rang out in the air, “GO TO THE RIGHT!!!” and for a minute there which was experienced as very long time because the silence that come with it was deafening. I couldn’t see who or what it was that created that voice from above. Confounded, I took one more step straight and not right,... again I heard , “GO TO THE RIGHT, GO TO THE RIGHT!! I immediately looked up and across and then I saw it. Damned, it was not God. It was Spastic Don, calling out GO TO THE RIGHT like he was selling some Kueh Mueh on top of his head and not necessarily looking t’wards my dreary direction.
Paper trail went downslope, crossed a shallow stream and on to Check#3 at a T-junction near an Indian Temple. Our trail continued left round the top side of a valley and looped right with a longish undulation running to Check#4 which was already broken, leading to Check#5 near a second Indian Temple. Carlo walked past me from opposite direction, looking rather heat-stroked and said he was SCBing back. We then looped right side around a hill to Check#6 which was aladi bloken too leading to a forked trail with paper on both trails. I risked taking left and short, whoa!, a familiar sight of the rock&shale hill heartily appeared before me. Only then did I allow the reality of how bloody thirsty I was to be recognized. It took me 1.50 hours to complete this ‘run’, mostly walking, but this one Run was truly a run well set, just like in the 80s. Thanks Mary, Colin and Nick, you guys were gr8 !!
Run Site Circle
Charges and acknowledgements made by GM Dave :-
Victims of recent injuries:
Nick Morss’ hobbling around with a mild ankle fracture anda swollen foot from last week’s commando desert storm run. He limped into circle with help of a 4-legged metal crutch (then walked away without its assistance. A true blue hashman, you are, on on);
Electric Guitar-guy, Peter ..Minibus doing a 3-point turn accidentally reversed and pinned him to his Volvo bonnet while he was checking his dipstick;
Mike Clarke..FROP appeared to have injured his voice-box as no one has ever heard him call ON ON or Check Call during Runs, never ever….;
Paul Kirkman, for abandoning his waiting family and came for the run, alone…a good hashman, on on!
Jimmy Lengchai was iced for spreading a rumour recent Friday that a well known hasher from RSCHash had died.
GM Dave congratulated Volvo Khoo and Dan Pussyville(?) for an excellent job done in revamping the PH3 website and quipped that time being, there were glitches of old and new website taking turns to come on within a same day;
ON ON Circle
The Run was judged a T-Shirt Run agreed by all
JM Don did his Tit-tit Bump Bump song n acts with freshies n ‘virgin’ ladies led by Ben and Pey Lin;
Carlo’s son’s stand-up comedy was much to our ticklish delight;
Food was good @ RM18 ppax;
Regards,
Tommy
(Recent Hash names- Peeping Tommy, Old Prostitute Legs, FuckFace, Pimp …surrendering to love for hash at our sacred PH3, ON ON!)