Venue : Ulu Yam Lama
Hare : Yeat Me Kio
Co-Hare : 2nd Sector Hash Challenge Hares
Scribe : Joanna Yoong
SCRIBE REPORT for 25th Sept. 2004 (even tho’ no-one reads them anymore.....)
When I heard Rambo was the hare for this run and he would do a “short” one and a “getting ready for the Challenge” one, I didn’t want to go. But I was the scribe so I checked the instructions, gave them out to all the members who don’t have computers (why don’t they get hard copies????) and set off up the old Ipoh Road to Batu 161 (as per the instructions). After Batu 160, we turned left and I realised some of the people I had given instructions to wouldn’t get there.
We parked in the normal run site from where I have done two terrible Rambo runs.
GM Jim called everyone to attention so he could tell us that there was different paper for the two runs and no-one had any idea which was which or if there would be any signs to indicate the long from the short! Great.
Understandably, a very small pack set off with great trepidation. The Challenge group not wanting to do the short run and the normal people averse to doing 18 Km of hills (as is Rambo’s want).At this stage the only good thing about the entire afternoon was the light rain and the fabulous area.My “warm up slowly” gang and I set off along that lovely path that runs near a beautiful stream of clear water. After a mile or so horny Graham Woods comes up from behind demanding to know how we got there. “Along the main path and following nice little bits of paper Graham”, we relied. He informed us that we had missed the second check and as I understand it was up that bloody hill that Rambo loves – who cares. We proceeded to turn right with the path up a lovely valley with paper all over the place and bewildered people popping out from bushes and ferns. We eventually get to a “loop” with only square paper. This puzzled everyone as we were all expecting a spilt at this stage. Again runners all over the place and Colin H. trying desperately to sort it all out. Candy decided she and her flock had had enough and returned the way we had come. I felt like I needed a bit more so with Flo in hand went around the loop for the extra mileage. Coming out we again met confused hashers milling around so we decided to also retrace our steps. John C, Jane and that fast Chinese whose-name-I-can-never-remember, went down a path to the right. Evidently there was a sign down there that told the short runners to return the way they had come. There was also a long green snake with an attitude who objected to all the commotion and bit Michael when he tried to get friendly. As his group had no idea if he was about to die on them, they decided to take him back pronto. As chance would have it a local was biking nearby and gave him a lift. As Flo and I wound our way home the bike came past with Mike happily telling us he’d got bitten by a snake. He may be unique. I’ve hashed here for 21 years and this was the first time I’d ever been on a run with a snakebite. The klinic he rushed to had no anti-venom of course so gave him anti-histamine and hoped that would save him! (see – nobody gets bitten by a snake!)
Just before we reached the cars we come across Richard going in at 6:00 pm.
We sane people then set about consuming the lovely moon cakes provided by our Chinese members. About 7:30 pm we received a phone call from the 15 still out there who wanted to know how to break the (?) check? Rambo gave them instructions and I presume they eventually came back.
I needed to pass stuff (I always do) to two of the folk still wandering around in the bush but gave up waiting for them at 8:00 and we went off to eat.
Rambo always chooses good areas and is so willing to set runs. If he ever decided to set runs for the average hasher he would become the most invaluable member of the club. As it is, members now avoid his runs. It’s a good job some of us know how to set a proper run – and are constantly thanked for it!
Thank you Chinese members for the mooncakes, they were amazingly different!
Joanna Yoong
Venue : Near Semenyih Lakes Country Club
Hare : Joanna Yoong
Co-Hare : Johna Castleman & Jessica Russell
Scribe : Jenny Lee
At about 4 .00pm when just about 5 km from the runsite, the heaven turned black and my thoughts were to the Hare, if she was still in there setting the run, she must be praying hard. Nope, the heaven broke and it rained like it had never rained before!!
Run 1436 : 418 September 2004
Venue : Near Semenyih Lakes Country Club
Hare : Joanna Yoong
Co-Hare : Johna Castleman & Jessica Russell
Scribe : Jenny Lee
At about 4 .00pm when just about 5 km from the runsite, the heaven turned black and my thoughts were to the Hare, if she was still in there setting the run, she must be praying hard. Nope, the heaven broke and it rained like it had never rained before!!
However, God must have heard all the hashers prayers. Rain stopped just before Jimmy L. called On On at 4.30pm. A good turn out despite the weather.
After the oil palm, we went into a grassy patch, crossed stream and into durian. “Checking” was called and when this slow runner caught up with the pack, Yogi was in his elements on top of a “mountain” conducting a pack to break the check. David W. was also giving out instructions organising the front runners. Thomas and the Horn were back- trekking and Alex came charging back. Finally, On Back was called and up we went – a small slope.
Going forward, letting more energetic hashers overtake, came upon a fairly new hasher, wearing a white spaghetti string T-shirt and shorts. Probably she did not read the Hare’s instructions well enough. It’s Mossies Love Her Day – ooh... she couldn’t get the Mossies away. Followed her a while enjoying the show!! – oh so very very wicked!!
Another check was called somewhere up a rubber. When I arrived, the front runners had gone ahead. However, the connecting papers were not clear and a few guys were coming back. Saleem came and called On On down the rubber slope and the pack followed. Rubern came from behind and called out Old Paper – paper lama! Saleem called check at the bottom of the hill – no way to bash through . By which time, the back runners had caught up - Wing Sun, Irene, Timothy and Jimmy L.
I met Philippa Y on the slope. She was just as lost as all of us. Obviously, Mum did not tell her kids the secrets of her run!!
Ruben called paper on top of the hill and the climb up. We had to cut through jungle – up and down. Timothy very nearly rolled down onto yours truly – thank god it did not happen – would have serious injuries - hey have a look at him – he is using our hash run to help him to loose weigh.
After the hills, its everyman for himself – the Hare cleverly made all of us sweat – up down rubber, palm, open space, logging treks – no more time to jot down notes otherwise, the Scribe will have a whole night’s episode to write – not forgetting the night out with the Hare and few others once upon a time last year!!
By 6pm, I was still in the wilds with Timothy for company – managed to catch up with him and vice versa. I remembered the Hare asking me 2 weeks ago – how long my run would take to which I was reminded of a possibility of having to reset another run 10 weeks later – I thought this run would be a piece of cake – but by 6.15 pm and still no sight of cars!! still up down, loop in and out of palm, rubber – no ending yet. Met up with Irene, Jimmy L. and Richard M traversing the estates.
Finally came out and what a relief - a quick congratulation to the Hare and to Nan to find out Alex came in at 1.26 followed by many others – Boy! oh Boy ! I have to buck up on the fitness or forever keep the comic/hares on their toes!!
Surprisingly Guinness came out after and as he put it “took the long cut” for once!! to be followed by Jimmy L. and Richard M.
Spoke to our Triathlete Iron Lady who made everyone who knew her proud especially Jimmy L. - a special feature on her in the newspaper recently – she loved the run – weather very good, home run - good running trail – ran right into the beer wagon for a deserving cold 100plus! Many others also shared Patsy’s view.
Thank you Joanna – it was a very good run – well planned and on top of that God listens! – the weather stayed good. Did not attend the On On – I bet it was just as good!!
Venue : Pangsum
Hare : Kim Dall
Co-Hare : Greg Dall
Scribe : Arne Tjaden
A) The Run Site (for those who do not remember incl. myself)
How did I get there? About 2kms after Phoenix Plaza went through the
toll gates. About 500m after the toll turned LEFT to Ulu Langat and
Pekan Batu9. Made sure that I do not use the left lane on the slip road
that forces me to make a sharp left turn. Drove through the village and
at traffic lights at the police station turned LEFT.Set my trip meter at
the police station . At 7.7km mosque on left, went straight through the
traffic lights on B52 to Pekan Bt.18. At 15.2km (Pekan Batu 18) went
straight on B19 towards Pangsun.At 18.3km turned LEFT (signposted Nur
Lembah-Pangsun and Kg. Hulu Perdek/Hutan Lipur.Went along this bitumen
road until 20.9km.Turned LEFT on to gravel road signposted Hutan
Lipur/Hulu Perdek and followed hash sign to the end of this road where
the hash car WGR9093 was parked.
Correct? Sure is ...
B) The Run:
Sorry guys, I did not run but was hanging around at the run site
checking for
peanuts and early beer cans. Fortunately brought my own ... Heard the
runners
throughout the 1.5 hours running time yelling all over the place on an
anti-clockwise
trail that must have been the same or close to the one from Wednesday
earlier this
year. Enjoyed the good weather and some stories of big cats that have
been spotted
here a few years ago. Also noted that Kim the Hare for today came in
1hour before
the Co-Hare Greg. Any dispute over some false trails?
C) The Charges:
Ouch, a lot, first of all Marlies who was run over by Marla. Went for
emergency
treatment and some forced stitches that was coming in at around 800.00
RM.
Thomas for running the downhill stretch at full blast and enjoying an
evening out
with his Chinese friends - the massage must have been in the range of
400.00 RM.
He also paid 15,000.00 RM +++ for the damage that was caused the same
night out!
At least he stayed in hospital for a few days - all drugs included.
What-Your-Name guests from Italy, Argentina and probably some other 3rd
world countries
never showed up again since Colin K. used his most superior language
style to piss
them all off.
D) The On-On:
Not at the Beer Garden - some kind of Karaoke Championship going on
there - that one
lousy place to the left right after the bridge was the unlucky choice
for tonight.
Food was subsidized and the run awarded a T-Shirt. There was a
birthday?! Don't
fully remember but I still see some cake being shared with all 8 tables.
Good Run - let's just hope that Beer Garden is open next year!
cheers
Arne
Venue : Kinrara Golf Course area, Puchong
Hare : Brenda Ng Vs 98 hashers plus 6 humanoid dogs
Co-Hare : her-ultimate-half Bernard
Scribe : Chuck-wow of the Merdeka 2004 Sin Ning Traid
Preamble.
a. It is hereby ascertained that our now hen-pecked newly wedded Rosli ‘Fuckaewee’ Ahmad has consummated his long awaited freedom. Will we be hearing little ‘fuckawees’ from around the corner? Nazirah secretly informed our confidant that Rosli has been at it after the PH3 guests eventually left the groom’s residence on that over-stay-our-welcome wedding evening. Talk of over-indulging.
b. It is also confirmed that Suat did not graduate from the now infamous Silicon-Valley, now-kiasu Yaso bet her arse on it. We are please to inform Rob ‘Wong-Ah-Kow’ Stott that Suat will be able to join your Aquanauts Academy at Pulau Perhatian. However we suggest extra weighs required for depth submersing.
c. Ima wishes that she could accompany Nazirah [Fuckawee’s wife lah] in their quest for maternity-hood. May we suggest she seek Wolfgang’s effort and blessing.
d. Helen found out that her in-laws back in Cornwall, UK has the ultimate sock-burners - Cornwall Cider. It’s the piss of piss in all sense of the word. Best de-wormer known to the Brooke family.
e. It nice to see Paul ‘Hash Shag’ Smith and Opera Cheong are back to hashing and training for the Hash Challenge 2004. No, I’m not that mentally challenged to take up their offer to participate.
f. Rosli ‘Fuckawee’ reiterate that his Hash life-style will not change now that he is married… Hello, live in the real world my friend, I placed my circumised prick to bet it has changed the day you cannot send her back to her parents’ house after shagging her on a night out. She is yours to keep, for goodness or otherwise. Some F..khead this Fuckawee.
g. Hot off the Press; Gudrun Feil is suffering from culture/post trauma shock while back home in Motherland, Germany. Need to get back to Malaysia to seek solace with PH3 this coming weekend for two weeks. Please be gentle and kind to her when giving her welcome back hugs.
The Run.
That Piece-of-Dog-Shit Grand Messiah summoned all and beholds to bow before him at the appointed time. On the advice of Arnie and Ah Kow Stott, he led the multitude across the rocky moon surface towards this steep incline. However some recalcitrant in Yogi, Rambo and followers decided to take the low road that channeled to a dead end, we had a good yahhhing. Just as we were about to reach the top of this hill some bright arse called that we are on in in-trail papers, from the top we could see afar someone marshalling the pack to the correct out-trail. Down a small ravine into the forest that led to a long steep incline. Now the FROPs were at the back of to pack, that’s what hashing is about, you don’t get the last laugh. Initially I was behind the P-O-D-S GM up this rotan-filled forest, he got side tracked to the left and I found a bloodied-nose Pommy talking incomprehensibly about this dog and the tree branch that attacked him. Now was this long single-file puffing its way to the top of the hill, have you tried following behind Patsy, Kwan and Emilia up a steep incline with lots of sharp rotan creepies. Never ending screams and whining; The cake must be given to this mother-of-all-bitching CWTTANC woman hasher who whined and cursed her fat arse way to the top. Bloody painful to the ears if you are amidst this thing, our sincere empathy to the domestically challenge and abused husband.
Half way up, met up with a guest of Voon [RLC gang] who was without footwear, am I seeing thing? Apparently the hasher did not advised his guest on the appropriate attires required for hashing, our quest was dressed for an evening-stroll-in-the-park, his junior wore a pair of sandals which got stuck and lost in a mud pool. Good old dad offered his footwear to the son and he went barefooted himself for paternal instinct, the rest was history when dad got back to the run-site totally ‘destroyed’.
At the top of the hill was a beautiful fern-lined trail that ran along the ridge, single-filed behind Mei, Jane and Virginia for a good half hour. Paper was heard to be calling on our right off the trail and descended all the way back to the run-site. Some where along the descend we lost Mei, as there were stragglers behind her on this single- file trail, we won’t too worried.
It was a relatively short run with a good 10 minutes waylaid by the GM at the start; front runners got in within the hour with most in within 20 minutes of one another. Good length for returnee hashers and long Merdeka-weekenders. Yes we managed a sweaty workout, however Macho Rambo said he didn’t swear at all. Well to each his/her own in hashing.
The Circle.
a. Ah Kow Stott and Arnie for leading the GM up the in-trail were KNLBCCBed down.
b. Mei, Florence and Maid Marion for foot, bum and face abused in that order.
c. Returnee in over pregnantly looking Christie C and Richie Moss. Who is to say
we men are not sensitive and empathetic to female pregnancy should see Richie for opinion.
On On.
At Restoran YY around the corner from the run site at Taman Bandar Kinrara. Five full tables graced the evening of mediocre hash dining. Perhaps the portion of serving was a bit too small for hungry hashers after a good workout. The hare was extremely generous in providing umpteen big bottles of Carlsberg for the five tables, my table had to refuse additional offers. Wonders never cease that hashers refused beer offers from the hare at on on.
Mr Babi Brooke fell off his chair from body-mass indulging from his UK vacation that almost cost the Hare to pay for chair damages. Wait till he gets home when Auntie Helen will give him a earful for public embarrassment to the Brooke family.
The Hash bits farewell again to Yaso and Nigel for seeking fortune in Kiasu land, good riddance to utter rubbish. However free B&B is available if PH3 members are down in Kiasuland, see Auntie Helen for onward reservations. We should have a by-law to implicate that this couple must give us PH3 a welcome-and-nice-to-have-us-back party if they ever come back to PH3 in the near future.
Thank you Brenda and Bernard for the pleasant evening of hashing.