Hare: LAI FOO WENG
Co-Hares: ANDY
Venue: Kg Kemensah, Zoo Negara Ulu Kelang
Scribe: Wolfgang Druba
You may not see our GM that often these days. But after I parked my car on a rocky slope, watching the crowd to juggle their wheels into the little left space, Tuan GM was barking at me:
“Don’t forget to take notes!” “Yes Sir! I will, Sir” …just suppressing my thoughts:”…and who will write about my excellent run a week ago? Where is equality in this world?”
The run> 8+ km with 60% single file on jungle slopes, up, down, slippery.
The rest logging roads and a short tarmac stretch back home. 2nd and 5th check got the pack together.
Frops back home in 1hr 35 min and most of the pack back within next 15 min, greeted by copious portions of satay, freshly barbequed at the run site. Great!
Quite a good result for a new hare, although the checks were engineered by old hand Rambo.
Expect to have another run there again soon. Then hopefully with a more spacious parking option.
The circle> Ramli got his well deserved HariRaya bonus.
The other charges were just the regular domestic cases, dragging on 30 min too long.
Anyway, I don’t bother as long as I can sit in my chair, watch massive clouds rising up over the dark forest and I can enjoy my cigar with a beer out in cool nature.
The OnOn> My directions to the restaurant are something like: at the Caltex Station turn right…
but then it’s a Petronas and the intelligent pack fails to make it. To avoid those shortcomings, the hare handed out
a sophisticated map with detailed markings in double lines featuring the roads to the restaurant.
Sam got charged as he in truly Malaysian style thought> “why following all those corners through the boonies.
Just head for MRR and turn right…” forgetting it is a 6 lane highway with a divider. Reminding me, that F 1 training for the Singapoore GP goes till 8.30.
Setting my priorities right, I decided to head home. On the way out to ZooNegara I followed a big pack of cars, all heading for the OnOn.
Hmmm..But they didn’t follow the map directions. No! They exactly did, what Sam was proposing> turning left on the MRR to make a U turn later and finding their way to the restaurant.
Poor hare…all his efforts in drawing a map were let down by the inability of Malaysians and Matsallehs likewise to read a map.
Brilliant. Did Sam got another on down at the OnOn? Who knows, I was not there….
Hare: Mary Morss
Co-Hare:Nick Morss, Colin Hercus
Venue:Rasa
Scribe:Tommy Chin ( Substituting for Alvin Chah)
This location was banned from hashing, some years ago, due to presence of notorious bees. A number of hashers were stung and hospitalized, then. But, alas, over recent years, the outcrop of overwhelming demand for local wild honey appears to have annihilated the hives and bees from these parts, what the honey people call, overharvesting…human stings on beehives, more potent than bee stings on human. You see, being substitute scribe, I can write anything under the sky and when things go wrong, the scribe is to blame, yahoo! Alvin, the scribe, has flown off somewhere, got me to scribe and now I wonder why I agreed especially having forgotten I’m flying off tomolo as well. I hope this sorry ass gets anwarised when he’s back perhaps on the 16th , but I guess nothing will happen when everyone get badawised ‘stand-sleeping’ cos I am trying to avoid being so f-ing nice that it becomes cruel to be nice!
Alright, lets get right down to bizness, huh (Jimmy, right?..is that how you say it..).
We reached the run site in barely an hour from wherever we normally came from, no one was late…not even our incredible GM Dave who normally drive down from work in JB, fly from Denmark, swim across from work islands in the South, sometimes Singapore(?), coupled with coping with fierce renovations at home, defending Charlotte from wrestling it out with the electricians, carpenters, tile layers, masons and all sorts of labourers, including accidental pipe breakers. Frankly, I do hope all you guys here can see, the man is not superman but close to it though, considering most of the aforesaid . Thank you GM Dave. On this day, a clean shaven GM Dave set the Run off at precisely 4.30pm, handled a vicious dog fight between Zorro and Michael’s leashed Dobby, completed the Run, ran the Circle later and off he went for another emergency calling, presumably, from ‘Jimmy Olsen’. (Note: On 2nd thoughts, seriously so, I think Mike’s dobby ought to be muzzled as hash dogs seem to go for the dobby and lands up being bitten badly. I hope Zorro’s alright).
The sun was blazing, flushed red faced hashers straggled off at the start of the Run. We promptly veered left in to shady hillside tracks and hit Check #1 which continued down slope. Check# 2 took long to break. I checked high up a ragged bushy hill, awkwardly a checking in despair as it showed up, recceing through multilevel terraces up, up, over the top and no paper still. No call nor sight of any hashers could be heard or seen by then. Only palm rattan and very thick bushes everywhere. I looked back far below, realised I am not very clever as usual and started making my way down. I did not think any hashers would be as stupid as I until Carlo and then Kwai Hoong showed up, ha ha. I am so glad. We cut 45 Degrees down all the way across the terraces in the direction of faint ON ON calls far away across the side of the swamp. Carlo hit right and he was right. By then, I had gone the less right way down lower and nearer the ON ON calls only to realize that what separated me from the paper trail high above was a blasted knee deep swamp with overgrown lallang, floating dead branches, decayed trunks, black muddy stinking waters,..eew… and Kwai Hoong was behind urging me on, curtly, asking me - why so slow? Hello-o, fyi, I was still on Steroid Eyedrops and Arcoxia Painkillers but you know, Unc Shag will tell you that the painkiller is “I cocks yuh”. Just when I felt eerie thinking this little stretch of swamp was habitat to plenty of camouflaged dirty hungry crocodiles lurking around underneath, a sudden sharp voice rang out in the air, “GO TO THE RIGHT!!!” and for a minute there which was experienced as very long time because the silence that come with it was deafening. I couldn’t see who or what it was that created that voice from above. Confounded, I took one more step straight and not right,... again I heard , “GO TO THE RIGHT, GO TO THE RIGHT!! I immediately looked up and across and then I saw it. Damned, it was not God. It was Spastic Don, calling out GO TO THE RIGHT like he was selling some Kueh Mueh on top of his head and not necessarily looking t’wards my dreary direction.
Paper trail went downslope, crossed a shallow stream and on to Check#3 at a T-junction near an Indian Temple. Our trail continued left round the top side of a valley and looped right with a longish undulation running to Check#4 which was already broken, leading to Check#5 near a second Indian Temple. Carlo walked past me from opposite direction, looking rather heat-stroked and said he was SCBing back. We then looped right side around a hill to Check#6 which was aladi bloken too leading to a forked trail with paper on both trails. I risked taking left and short, whoa!, a familiar sight of the rock&shale hill heartily appeared before me. Only then did I allow the reality of how bloody thirsty I was to be recognized. It took me 1.50 hours to complete this ‘run’, mostly walking, but this one Run was truly a run well set, just like in the 80s. Thanks Mary, Colin and Nick, you guys were gr8 !!
Run Site Circle
Charges and acknowledgements made by GM Dave :-
Victims of recent injuries:
Nick Morss’ hobbling around with a mild ankle fracture anda swollen foot from last week’s commando desert storm run. He limped into circle with help of a 4-legged metal crutch (then walked away without its assistance. A true blue hashman, you are, on on);
Electric Guitar-guy, Peter ..Minibus doing a 3-point turn accidentally reversed and pinned him to his Volvo bonnet while he was checking his dipstick;
Mike Clarke..FROP appeared to have injured his voice-box as no one has ever heard him call ON ON or Check Call during Runs, never ever….;
Paul Kirkman, for abandoning his waiting family and came for the run, alone…a good hashman, on on!
Jimmy Lengchai was iced for spreading a rumour recent Friday that a well known hasher from RSCHash had died.
GM Dave congratulated Volvo Khoo and Dan Pussyville(?) for an excellent job done in revamping the PH3 website and quipped that time being, there were glitches of old and new website taking turns to come on within a same day;
ON ON Circle
The Run was judged a T-Shirt Run agreed by all
JM Don did his Tit-tit Bump Bump song n acts with freshies n ‘virgin’ ladies led by Ben and Pey Lin;
Carlo’s son’s stand-up comedy was much to our ticklish delight;
Food was good @ RM18 ppax;
Regards,
Tommy
(Recent Hash names- Peeping Tommy, Old Prostitute Legs, FuckFace, Pimp …surrendering to love for hash at our sacred PH3, ON ON!)
Hare: Alvin Chah
Co-Hares: Rambo, DonCheng and Ti
Venue: Hulu Rening
Scribe: Quek Pei Lynn
Comic: Sharon DeSouza
Looking at the list of co-hares and the run site, I knew the hashers were in for a tough one as the last time around, even our illustrious front runners could not break the checks! I distinctly remember that the hare had to sit on ice!
It was a raining the whole day in KL and it continued on during the run which led to an eventful run. Heard it was some 11 km long. Four checks with a couple of falsies all together, with the first one being the toughest check! Took about 20 mins with a wrong on-on call from Chiew Chiew which led the FRB round the circular once again! Second and third checks took about 10 minutes to be broken which kept the group fairly together. Ran past some beautiful bamboo trees, orchards and of course the customary river which was COLD! But by the fourth check, there were casualties encountered by the group – dislocated shoulder, sprained ankle, some lost hashers as well… Luckily our poor injured comrades made it out alive with the help of our three 3 heroes namely Raymond, Dan and Rob. Three big cheers to them!
First runner came in at 6.45pm and the last runner at 7.45pm! Yes, it was indeed a long run and the rain made it more challenging. It had some good areas for solid running and also sliding down the mud on 5th gear with no break controls!
Circle was held at Restaurant 218 and once again our GM was missing! Run was judged a toilet seat. Food was good.
On on!
Hare: Klaus Gehlaar
Co-Hare: Dan Dadahman
Venue: SERI BAYU RESORT, Sg Tekala, Seminyeh
Scribe: Alister for Reiko Ashida
Comic: SKKhoo
Its either Japanese or English Gazette style of scribe writing!!!
Generic Scribe Report for Run 16 August 08
Please select from the choices provided to get your tailored scribe report encapsulation your own personal experience.
Directions to the run were (good, average, poor, of suitable English style quality) and so we arrived (early, on time, the same time as John Lavelle and Choo).
Weather was (rainy, very rainy) and there were a number of (steep, very steep) hills. The hare laid the (too much, not enough) paper and so (no one, someone, everyone) got lost.
During the circle a number of charges were made relating to the (Hare’s mother, Dutch socks, Fierce Gay Boy’s sexuality, quality of the run) and fun was had by (all, many, none). Announcements were also made regarding (Nenasi, Bangsar Hash, Full Moon Hash, someone’s wedding) by (Nan, Hugh).
On on was (on-site, close, impossible to find) and the food provided was (superb, average, irrelevant as I was on my fifth bottle of tiger). Hash virgins were introduced and they promised to (sue us, never return, come back next week).
Run was awarded (10 weeker, on down, t-shirt)
On On On was held at (Backyard)