Venue: Setiawangsa, Ampang
Hare: Chua Yew Leong
Scribe: Eloise Ong
I was reminded of former Indonesian President B.J. Habibie's now famous "little red dot" quote of a country he was describing when somebody mentioned that today's run site was just "a pimple in the middle of KL" as seen on Google Earth and so, it could not possibly offer good hashing. But Don Cheang said it's not a little red dot, it's "a bloody Octopus", enough for a "short and long run"!
Anyhoo, was that hasher (and Habibie) wrong; that little red pimply dot was simply ripe and bursting with plenty of hashing opportunities, as displayed in today's run. After a 1 min silence in respect to Guinness Khoo's recent passing, the run started off down the dirt road where hash cars were crammed alongside due to limited parking areas available. We ran briefly along a residential road and into a patch of lalang, emerging onto a drain path that formed part of a row of steep terraces hugging the hill.
At the end of the drainage path, we clambered down and entered the swampy side of the hill. Soon, the front runners were calling a check which was broken easily with an on-call that went straight up the hill. This spread the pack apart as we climbed past secondary forest trees and even banana trees. I was glad that there were no thorny-like trees in the way. As we got to the top, it was naturally downhill again and I could hear a distant rumble although the sun was still shining and it was humid.
It was a well-defined trail as we go down the slope and into the tropical forest and I ran along the trail with Laurence ahead of me. It was at this time I noticed there were triangle as well as the usual square-shaped hash papers littering the trail and I wondered if there was any meaning to that. Bob the JM didn't mention anything about a short and long run at the start so I wasn't sure if Don Cheang had really set a short and long run. Anyway, my thoughts were broken with an incessant buzzing emitted by Laurence aka Mosquito; he was biting me with the same question over and over again, "do you know you are the scribe for today's run?" buzz buzz buzz. With only one-and-a-half lungs, it's always a task trying to run and maintain a nice breathing rhythm and sometimes having to say the occasional "hi", or "On-on". I squeaked a "Yes!" back at him and he finally flew off, straight down the trail and a sharp right turn which I missed because I was sucked dry by then, but thankfully I was kindly buzzed by Mosquito to get back on paper.
We climbed up a bit and a check was called. Somehow a group of us got out onto the trail for the short run, completely missing the split, and had to backtrack for about 300 meters to rejoin the long run which went down and around the hill for a while into an area where the trees were well spaced out and then there was some confusion about finding paper up the slope as well as down the slope. Perhaps the front runners didn't join the check properly.
Soon, it was up the hill and down and along a well-worn trail, by this time a slight drizzle had started and when I hit a tarmac road, the heavens opened. The run went along the road for about a kilometer and then veered left into the jungle onto a trail. I managed some nice running and at some point I emerged on top of the hill where a few hashers stopped to admire the view and afterwards, the trail merged with the short run and went down to the bottom of the hill where apparently there must have been a check.
Nobody could find paper but for sure the front runners were gone. Shouts of "Checking" filled the air and finally someone found paper back up the hill and along a now muddy trail which led to the top of the dirt road/run site where the run started.
The short run was about 5-6km and the long run 8.5km. With a few "lost" hashers still out there, the circle was called and a few charges were made. Notably, a tribute to the late Guinness Khoo was made with Don Cheang standing in for his spirit. Uncle Looi, Rambo and an ex-GM (Gerry?) now residing in Denmark were called up to say a few words about Guinness.
There were a few other charges but it was starting to drizzle heavily so the circle was adjourned to the on-on. The on-on had around 5 tables and the food was delicious.
More charges were made; one for Hugh Murray whom everyone voted unanimously was foolish enough to go look for his lost wife who apparently left the trail and walked all the way to Carrefour to shop. Other lost hashers were reported not lost at all as they went home without informing the people they came with. Cyril and family were called up as they were leaving Malaysia for Miami. Goody-two-shoes Sen was charged for breaking 3 traffic offences, driving with an expired road tax and driver's license and DUI, and getting away with a RM1K bribe.
To end the night, the JM called for a vote and the run was judged an on-down which means a satisfactory run.
Venue: Palm Oil Plantation on Ulu Yam to Genting Road
Hare: Eloise Ong
Co-Hare: Fierce Gay Boy
Stand-in Scribe: 'Yahoo' Choo Nai Kwong (and edited by Emilia), for the absent Lye Shyong Ling
The scribe did not turn up for the run and neither did he appoint anyone, and since he does not like to sit on ice, I was asked to deputise.
Run directions were good although the signboards were limited. There was a crowd of 60-70 runners and on-on was called towards the river which was slightly swollen due to the rain the previous day.
Up the hill we went and the first check was called. It was broken after a while and the track went left. It was beginning to look like an anti-clockwise run uphill, plantation and then downhill.
There were about 4-5 checks which were quite easily broken with enough secondary jungle, flat land and rubber to satisfy the runners. Running towards home meant re-crossing the river and a lot of us stayed in the water to cool down and admire the fantastic scenery.
As this run was a preamble to the Ball-Breaker Run the following day, the run was kept relatively short with the first runner in slightly after an hour and the rest of the pack following closely behind.
At the circle the usual shit was served with a couple of charges that I can't recall now but can vouch that it was just enjoyable with the hashers poking fun at each other.
On-On was at the old Lucky Like with about 4-5 tables with a spread of 7 dishes. Run was judged a T-Shirt but since the haberdash was absent we all voted for the hare Eloise to bare her body at the next run.
All-in-all it was a wonderful evening --- thanks to the hare and co-hare.
Yahoo Choo for Lye Shyong Ling who now owes me big time for saving his ass and balls from being frozen while scribing on ice.
Venue: Taman Bukit Mantin
Hare: Lye Shyong Ling
Scribe: 'Jimmy Leggett
It was a long drive out to a beautiful runsite located on the top of a hill with majestic views of the countryside. Some parked a bit downhill but soon moved their carriages to the top of the hill so they could also enjoy the view – which as it turned out was an unfortunate choice for Paul Johnson.
The run started promptly on time and wandered down a dirt road for a short distance before going down into a valley at the first check. Some of the veterans lead by Mr. Opera continued on the road and were soon at the front of the pack as the others were most of the pack was climbing out of the valley. The run continued on circling around a couple of hills in a generally upward mode on the dirt road to reach the 2nd check which again had a beautiful view. A few hardy souls when even further up and there were unconfirmed reports of a false trail. It was steeply downhill behind so only one or two hard core lads checked that area. Paper was finally found in a more or less straight direction but slightly downhill. Paper continued downhill to the 3rd check and it was finally confirmed that the run would be a rather large loop in the mostly counterclockwise direction.
Up to this point it had been a great run in a beautiful area. However, it was at this point that thing went to Hades in a Handbag. There were two more checks and some very steep hills with a minimum (if any) paper. Very tough going for this stage of the run. Dave Parks while halfway up one of the mountains while gasping for what appeared to be his last breath stated what we were all thinking …. “Well the Hares really f**ked up what could and should have been a great run”. Like everyone else I spoke with back at the runsite – all were in full agreement. If the Hares had found a better way to get home from the halfway point it could well have been the run of the year.
First runner was in at 1 hour 55 minutes on this little 9 kilometer adventure. The Scribe was in at 2 hours 30 minutes. 1st check was broken by Tee. 2nd and 3rd checks were broken by Dave Parks (that was before the Killer Mountains). The 4th and 5th checks were reportedly broken by Choo Nai Kwong – the Scribe would have no idea since he was far behind the pack at this stage. The Hare was dutifully awarded a Toilet Seat. If only they had done a better job on the second half …… it would have been wonderful.
A few items of interest and we all know the Hash and Hashers are always interesting:
• In the Run Directions the Hares had clearly stated (in red) “Note: We will be running through commercial orchards – the fruit belongs to the farmers, so please do not take/eat any fruit.” With that clearly stated the pack would not partake of the fruits. However, do you know the Hares were caught on this run? Always a sin in the hash. Do you know what they were doing when they were caught? They were taking/eating durian from trees and ground!!!! I guess another example of “Do as I say, not as I do”.
• Somewhere between the toll road and the road to the runsite Paul Johnson managed to damage his front left wheel which resulted in tire going flat. This was noticed as he was jockeying his car further uphill. As always, before the run starts a hasher having carriage problems is great interest to the rest of the hashers. Everyone thinks he is a mechanic. There must have been 10 different hashers trying to help get the tire and wheel off the car while Paul was studying every booklet available that came with the car. Eventually the tire was changed but it was a major Endeavour… as it always is with hashers.
• Elaine Leong fell and was slightly injured during the circle when she went to take a piss. The injury was primarily to her pride but it does should the need to be attentive and not leave the circle.
• The circle did not convene until 8:00 pm with four runners still out. They came in just after Elaine completed her piss stop. They not only complained about the length and difficulty of the run but also lodged complaints about the wetness of the ground area at the runsite and the smell.
• Four 5 year mugs were given out. The first went to Stephanie Choong who accepted it with grace while dressed in only her towel. We liked that. The 2nd went to Raymond Lei who was fortunately fully clothed. Dave and Charlotta Parks each received and also were properly clothed.
Venue: Antara Gapi
Hare: Pang Soo Wah
Co-Hares: Two Virgins
Scribe: Laurence (standing in for Melinda)
Comic: Charles Lee
It was an easy drive to Antara Gapi - a turning off the Old Ipoh Road that I'd never taken before. We drove through new housing estates, and then along empty roads and up a small steep hill. The run-site wasn't visible from the road going up, so some of us further up the hill and then looked back to see all the cars, and lots of people laughing.
The GM, JMs and several others were away in Kuching for the InterHash, but there was a good turn-out, and plenty of visitors.
From the run-site we had a great view of the mountains in the distance, and a number of isolated hills closer to us. We were wondering how far Pang and Rambo would take us, and which of the hills we'd have to climb - knowing Rambo, it would probably be all of them!
The Onsec (yours truly) stood in and set off the run. It started down a steep drain, causing a slow single-file queue, so some front-runners threw caution to the wind and ran down the slope, while a few older wiser hashers found an easier route in the trees.
After a small rubbish dump at the end of the road, we disappeared into jungle, and proceeded to and up one of the smaller nearby hills - at least, it looked small from afar, but felt quite large when we were climbing!
After about 45 minutes of checks and hills, but all going roughly in the same direction, we descended to find ourselves at a tall vertical waterfall - a beautiful sight for sore feet! A few front-runners ignored the natural beauty and stayed on paper, but most of us had a very strong shower (nice massage) under the clear cool waterfall.
Those who lingered at the waterfall were proved wise, as a short clamber across/through a muddy stream full of felled bamboo led to a track, then back across the stream to a check. This check took the longest to solve, with paper eventually found directly above it, up a steep sloop 50 metres from the waterfall.
By this time, most of the pack was either at the check or enjoying the waterfall, so everyone started clambering up the hill, which eventually led us into the clear stream that feeds the waterfall. Luckily we turned left, up the stream, instead of turning right and plummeting over the waterfall.
A bit more jungle, and then some wide tracks, led us along the very long trail back to the run-site, with the remaining checks solved quickly and the tired pack spreading out enormously.
The front-runner was back in a little under 2 hours, and back-runners were still coming back a lot later - luckily some of the walkers and visitors had turned back after (or even before) the first hill.
The circle saw some football fun (in those days, Germany and Holland were both still in the World Cup, and Germany even thought they could win), plus some tennis fun (Hugh 'Andy' Murray against Cyril the Agassi-lookalike), plus a lot of fun charges and down-downs. The Americans were deservedly punished for being a day early with their 4th-of-July t-shirts, and one German runner (Stefan?) from the KL Harriettes was named as the German version of Fierce Gay Boy.
And then to the On-On (the usual place in Serendah) for most people...
... however, Emilia, Isacc and a new-ish Australian hasher were still out on the trail in the dark, and still missing after 9pm. Dianty (Gary Waring's girlfriend) was also a bit late, so he went off looking for her in his LandRover, and found her just arriving at the run-site, but they continued into the forest, along with the hare in another car, to search for the 3 lost souls.
Isacc used his escape-and-evasion skills to dodge the rescue vehicles and walked out on his own, but Gary brought back the other two, and finally we were able to leave the run-site at nearly 10pm.
I don't know about the On-On (Sen ran the circle there), but I am told the hare was given a Down-Down. That seems fair - the run location was great, with good trails, and the waterfall was excellent, but it was over-long for many people.
A little bird tells me that we may be back at the same run-site in 2 or 3 months, but I don't think we'll be going as far as the waterfall next time.